Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
I made the bartender pinky promise me there was still vodka in my drinks.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
I sent a picture of my balls to one of my best friends, so basically it was an average night.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I feel like I may be the only person who can say they crutched their walk of shame. past the secret service.
I love my cat. she doesnt judge when i stumble in my house drunk and pass out on my floor. my dog looks at me disappointed.
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
Randomize
