My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
BEES IN MY FUCKING PANTS. HELP.
Come in. Grab a controller and a beer. We've got some Madden to beat.
You're the best girlfriend ever.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
she has her graduation year in her skype name, it's like a constant reminder that she's jail bait.
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
Sweetie, don't go home with him. You can do so much better. Everyone else at the bar agrees.
I want to reach into my vagina and rip out my uterus with my bare hands. Understand how much it hurts now?
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Turns out he's old enough to be my dad. I'm so excited. I've never had a sugar daddy before. What should I ask for first!? Want anything?
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
