yo I wanna see you, bring that beard of yours
so he just left - touched my cheek like he was gona kiss me and then gave me a fist bump?
Probably should plan this out. Step one: grow stache. Two: get trenchcoat. Three: Kidnap Selena Gomez.
I had better be fucking involved with step four.
Todays lesson: Chew your food better when your drunk. I almost choked throwing up this morning.
Well, for starters you dressed up in all Green and kept singing that song from "A Goofy Movie". Then you made us call you Powerline for the rest of the night...needless to say no, you didn't hook up with her
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Ask politely.
Fine. Can i please come over, hang out with you, sit around a campfire, smoke tree, listen to sublime, and fuck the shit out of you?
Thats good enough.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
Feeling better?
I can stand long enough to do the dishes finally. Been trying that all day.
I'm all about sex. But even I know there will be a time to retire my junk. And that will be my 40th birthday, or whenever I'm hideous
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
You can’t homewreck what the Lord hath brought together.
i was ready to conquer the fucking world. i would have fought vin deisel to the death without hesitation
Randomize
