Should I have kids to fix a relationship??
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
I dunno. It's not as good as 'devourer of cocks' but I suppose few things are.
Breakfast tacos?
YOU ARE A FOUNTAIN OF GREAT IDEAS
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
You might not want to come home tonight. Mom just found your vibrator and now she won't stop sobbing and holding a framed picture of you as a little kid.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
I feel awkward giving career advice while naked
! asked the random counter guy from 7/11 for Percocet. he immediately called his hookup
I owe you an apology, I was appointed captain of this sexy fuckship and I fell asleep at the helm.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
i wish i could put you in a lil box, and keep you for when i need to be blown
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
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