so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
It was my birthday today and i decided that i am not checking my notifications on facebook so ill feel popular
Wrong number and your a loser
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
well the night couldnt get much worse after she peed all over herself and the sidewalk.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
He wants me to hook up with his fiance while he watches. Text you later with how it goes.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
He's super sweet. I feel like I'm dating Elmo. If Elmo had a 7 incher
Something must have happened, they started yelling truffle butter and you said we needed to leave NOW
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
Randomize
