alone in the kitchen at 4 am eating a hotdog.
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
why does my status of facebook already read REHAB 2011
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
That big chick who gave you the handly polished off one of the walls to the ginger bread house right before she came outside. FYI
There are 27 signatures on my ass. What the hell happened last night?
Every time someone made a cup you congratulated them by letting them sign your ass.
Ok well hopefully you're not staging an intervention for me at your place because I'm bringing beers
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
Whatever. I am not explaining the physics of my dick slapping.
DAMMIT Im supposed to be running a company not discussing dick piercings!
i just had to pick up my 18 year old cousin from the police station for hosting a party, and i had to do this stoned wow
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
Randomize