You came back with puke all over your sweatshirt and started doing darth vader impressions
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
He had a beer bottle in each of his back pockets and was on rollerblades. All I remember is following him for about 10 minutes
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
Tell her to buy some booze and drink away her sorrows like an adult.
You get drunk and try to bury your girlfriend in the sand JUST ONCE and all hell breaks loose
Slow dancing with the chandelier.
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
The compounded multi day delayed hangover hit me hard today, with a vengeance normally reserved for large objects that go in my ass. I don't feel good.
We have GOT to stop getting stoned and going out for expensive dinners.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I'm just bringing him "breakfast," and breakfast may lead to lunch and dinner, but that doesn't mean I want the mealplan.
Randomize
