Good luck man
I dont need it. Shes easy.
why did u let me go home with him last night?
u were determined it was a good idea
For some reason, Oliver from Hannah Montana reminds me of pudding.
That's cute.
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
While you were in the ER we decided to tailgate in the parking lot until security told us that's not allowed.
We had him convinced Visine is flammable. He was genuinely freaked out that everyone would know when he was stoned.
I still don't like him. I'm also filled with alcohol, so I'll revisit the statement in the morning.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
Dollars spent: $83, Girls kissed: 4, Girls slept with:2, Girls currently making me breakfast: 1, Fucks given: 0
I either forgot underwear this morning or lost them at work and I seriously don't know which.
Okay, maybe filling water balloons with vodka was not our best idea.
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
The end of the friendship was inevitable. I hooked up with her cousin and forgot to mention it to her
Randomize
