i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
So i just bought beer on a credit card, using a fake ID, while wearing my nametag from work. All 3 have different names on them. God i love my boobs.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
so i told him i still liked him. he laughed
well, your crazy. what did you expect?
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
he belly flopped onto the beer pong table, and almost boke his face, so at that point we decided swimming would be safer for him.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
You ever got drunk on $5? Cuz it's about to happen
Pretty sure I'm about to get another tattoo. It'll have mom in there somewhere for Mother's Day.
She used my 100 Ways To Cope With Stress handout to wipe puke off her face
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
I just drunkenly signed my mortgage application...
Is this how the global financial crisis happened?
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
Randomize
