i thought i deleted your number from my phone...Wtf
I just got a ticket for shitting on a sand dune.
and im sitting here waiting for them to work on my car. in a room full of men. that are too old for me. its like a sausage fest nightmare...
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
made out with three guys on the first night of college orientation, just imagine what joys all of next year will hold
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
I will pee on everything he values.
Tomorrow may or may not be a problem cause i'll be wonder woman for a halloween party aka i'll be fucked up & try & jump off of shit thinking i can fly
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
I was dancing with a blow torch in one hand and a bowl of weed in the other
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
I'm giving drunk me full control of my body for the next few days. Please don't let me die.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
Randomize