I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
I'm at about main and main street
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Bartenders are not toys. I repeat, bartenders are not toys.
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
And that's the fourth pair of yoga pants with unwashable stains from you.
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
THE MAINTENANCE MEN WERE DOWN STAIRS AND I THOUGHT THEY WERE MY MOM. I'VE BEEN YELLING 'GRILL ME A CHEESE' AT THEM FOR HALF AN HOUR
Lets get coked out and steal a parrot this summer
So, it's been almost 3 months and and I still dont know her last name. That's gotta be a record.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
Randomize
