On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
Sean getting laid is an anomaly, Sean banging the hottest single girl at the wedding is a fucking unicorn being ridden by a leprechaun walking through mordor.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
I am gifting my birthday sex to you, but its okay because I can always just have birthday vibrator.
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
You stocked up?
No actually didn’t get a chance. If you wouldn’t mind bringing me a brownie and a bottle of Jameson that’d be nice
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