He's doing the single life. He recently finished like a 3 year relationship. You can't date him.
But I don't want to date him. I just want to look at him. Naked. And in my bed.
All i remember before i blacked out is you pointing to a random chick and telling me to bang her for America.
Im drunk and they're making me play quiet game. Im scared. Baptists are here
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
I need a therapist, but moreover we are going to be really drunk.
If you end up at a gay bar on a tuesday night in steelers pjs, does that mean youve hit rock bottom?
Why can't I hire someone to teach me how to be a decent human being?
I traded him cumming in my face for a year for a Disney annual pass. One giant leap back for feminism, one small step for the adult child Disney fan.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
he said he was going to fuck me like a rabbit in heat. What he should have said was faster then a train and over before a commercial
This is not the first time I've recognized my body is subconsciously trying to make pizza.
It was an interesting experience to have sex while there was a triathlon going on right outside my bedroom window because it sounded like everyone is cheering for you in bed.
How supportive!
The list of people who didn't throw up last night is insanely smaller than the list of people who did
So it was a successful night I take it?
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
