pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
there hasn't been a girl guy ratio this good since a guy jumped on one of the Titanic life rafts
ugh.. my birth control just came out of my nose. wtf?
he sent her a picture of his penis to show that he "trusts her" or some shit like that..well she showed it to me, and let me just tell you..it looked like a freaking slug or something. creepiest penis i've ever seen. hands down
you kept begging me not to tell anyone you had been a bat in another life
dude. FULL moustache. it was like getting head from Tom Selleck
Reggie can tackle my bush.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
Handicvap rails on the toilet atre soooooo fuckin handy right nmow.
there's no way I could forget finding someone else's hand in my pants
Fucking her would be like seeing big foot, finding a four leaf clover , petting a unicorn, and arm wrestling a leprechaun in a matter of a 6 hour period
I think I reached some stage of aging, have a sore/injured shoulder from sex, next up carpal tunnel from sexting.
I heard you coughing. Are you choking or smoking? And are you okay?
I met a gypsy today. She told me my soul animal was an owl and says she will now remember me as "Owl Girl".
Randomize
