You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
Asian chick on skype stripping for me. Hold on give few min
I spent my night drunkenly staring at a picture of John Stamos. How do you think I feel?
there really is only one way to give a PowerPoint presentation in your senior capstone class: still drunk.
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
in the past 3 nights i've fucked a millionaire, a drug dealer and a civil engineer... i dont really have a "type" anymore
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
I remember because you made a pirate noise when you came.
Awkward sister question: which game of thrones female left would you fuck?
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
I just woke up in a prom dress on your bathroom floor, yea I'm 32.
Randomize
