he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
She walked in the room and sighed really loudly fishing for attention. but I didn't bite cuz I don't give a fuck what's wrong with her.
i convinced her that her period would come back if we did it doggy style
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I was rolling balls and tried to donate blood as an act of kindness to the sick person who would receive it
We just threw our carpet out of our room. Via fourth floor window style.
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
It's annoying. I only date people who are 6 foot 3, drug dealers, or 2 years older than me.
Let me refresh your memory. New Year's Eve in the back of my car you grabbed my hand and said feel my tumor on my butthole and at that moment I swear we were infinite
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
There was a point where you were singing "Friends in Low Places" to yourself while Juicy J was playing so I got worried.
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
If you sleep with him I will stab you int the uterus with a pitchfork.
Prepare the pitchfork.
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
Randomize
