fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
good call on bringing her. it's always good to invite chicks who mix booze and prescription drugs.
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Ohh man do you know how awkward it is to keep eye contact and have a normal conversation with someone while their hand is in your vagina?
I kind of drew a blank when the doctor asked me how I got super glue up my nose.
FUCK BUDDYS DON'T HOLD HANDS. NO EXCEPTIONS.
I just watched my mom get dick on Skype.
That d should have definitely been an s.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
It happened to me once. But i washed off in a duck pond and walked home naked.
I keep getting the feeling him and his friends are hilarious and we should drink whiskey together forever
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
It's three am. I'm drunk in a stairwell in Vegas. My flight leaves at six. Help.
Randomize
