She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Someone carved 'Hank' in all caps in the snow outside my apartment building so naturally I turned the capital H into a K and added an S to the front.
I think college has really matured you.
My heart is having a hard time convincing my vagina he's not worth it.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
Bro, the freshmen are smoking in the park again, do you need ammo for ur paintball gun?
I was laying there trying to sleep and then he sat up, took out his dick, and put it on my shoulder. It wasn't even hard- it was just casually perched.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
You know you need to take better care of yourself when shaving reminds you of sheep shearing...
Is it weird to say that Kobe reminds me of a wise brontosaurus?
Send help, water and tortillas.
I just put on lipstick to sext him. That should tell you where my love life is at.
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Just fucked my ex's brother. It is clear I dated the wrong one. Is it wrong for me to continue to fuck this one?
Randomize
