Well I thought I'd be nice but yeah I'm not a fan of you either you're an arrogant stupid cocky unfunny loser. Don't talk to me you're crazy
I just came to the conclusion that the most depressing part of my day is when I have to put clothes on.
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
He stole her cigarettes and walked 15 miles just so he wouldn't have to wake up next to her. God I love being a lesbian.
We just filmed our own version of iron chef. The secret ingreient was whisky.
What did you cook with whisky?
We started a fire.
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
You ordered 6 boxes of pizza and laughed in the pizza guys face when you didn't pay for any of them.
That sucks about the drama. But hey, it's always a good day when you see someone get tazed!
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
This is the only time in your life where finding a half eaten lime and pair of florescent pink underwear that wasn't yours means that it was a good night
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
So about that you can bill me for the chair but it was David's idea to jump from the window sill into the washer with "clothing pillows of cloudiness" to land on to get ahold of him you have to phone his mother
I just talked to her she really hates you like a lot
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
