So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I just saw Sharon Stone's cootch in high def. I think I'll stay gay.
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
Hey your work video crashed my computer. The 8 pornos running in the other window didn't. Congratulations.
I have more sex toys than shoes - HOW AM I SINGLE?!?!?
His mom walking in on us having sex was probably the highlight of the night
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
So by "wait for me" do you think he meant "Don't have sex with random dentists?"
Conference sex doesn't count if the dentist doesn't know your name.
You ever just SEE a guy and know he's good at choking someone out?
It's 3 am.
That’s talent right there. Maverick and Goose type shit.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
I don't know what the hell I'm going to do with myself when this is all over. I'll probably just go back to smoking pot and trying to learn italian.
I don't know why, but whenever I shave my balls I feel more aerodynamic.
What are you, a fucking toaster ?
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Randomize
