there is a homeless man oan crack poledancing on a fence... now hes humping it...
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
don't blame me for your drunken lack of judgement
big words... still drunk. dont care. your fault.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
okay. this is james and youre probably never ever gonna see me again unless i really really really want some pussy. sorry.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
As I am reading this. I'm standing in my underwear eating taquitos. I'm saying this in the most loving way possible: FUCK OFF.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
YO. MCGRIDDLES.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
I could tell my life story through kermit memes
as a side note pls kill me
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
