I'm kindof freaked out about my cock not getting up this morning. Cove over later so I can sort this out. Do not post this on texts from last night.
Damn that would have been a great one. Hahah and don't worry...
I will be horny for about another two hours. Feel free to call me until then.
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
she wrote "SORRY" in her vomit and left
i know we're in college but you cant booty call me at 3 in the afternoon. i dont care how drunk you are.
So he texted me two hours ago to tell me he just took two hits of acid. Now he's asking me if it's possible for a house to breathe.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
He also told me he would eat mozzarella sticks before having sex with me so I'm mad at him.
We had sex while watching the republican debate. I'm not sure how he maintained an erection watching Donald Trump speak.
I mean, don't most people have like a two week grace period where it's okay to ditch new friends?
You chose shitty college football over this pussy and my cute little mouth. That's your fault.
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
He sounds like Chris Tucker and wants to eat me out when I’m on my period. If that isn’t love I don’t know what is.
Randomize
