garbage
garbage dick
rubbish cock
you win
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
the whole city is out of plan b pills. this is the meanest game of musical chairs ever.
it's like i can feel the ghost of his dick still inside me
Somebodaw call 311 postw fire bunso on vietena floorwnkd
I'm sorry for peeing on your door. But it was your decision to open it.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
Oh I'm definitely going to hit on her, there's no question about that. What I meant by playing it cool is I'm not going to mount her on sight.
Yeah because the only thing stopping you from fucking Emma Watson is you not being a Gryffindor
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
We just had a contest for who has less of a gag reflex...I am sad to admit that my mother won.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
Randomize
