i cvme to yuor rooom...wherer are youf?
please be gone before i get back
So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
Helping a hot freshman girl move in = 2 hours of my life One bottle of cheap vodkas = $10 Watching her do the walk a shame on her first morning away from home = Priceless
Just drove past a church with a sign near it that said, "God wants to be your daddy."
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
Now go wash the fat girl off your hands.
He woke up licked his hand and put it on my vag and went back to sleep. This is twice this week and its only wednesday
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
He was still there when I ran half naked into my suitemate's room where she was skyping her boyfriend and I started singing I JUST HAD SEEEEX
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
I just got nudes while talking in the third person. Not sure if I Should be proud or ashamed.
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
What did you do with the dog when you went into the club?
coat checked
Im gonna start dry humping the manequins and see if i get fired.
Randomize
