He about cried when I ordered pizza online. He said it was a miracle.
she asked me if i can do her a favor, came over, and gave me head then left. i still dont understand how that was a favor for her.
Sometimes I wonder how different my life would be if I didn't share a weekly margarita with my mom since i was 12
In all honesty of all my sexual conquests, his dick is probably my proudest moment.
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
You may now shotgun with the bride
I just want to meet whoever runs the hall cameras
hahahaha I don't. Watch one day i'll be walking along and someone will stop me and say "oh you're that one girl who is out. of. control." But then they'd probably give me a high five.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
I came to the conclusion that Tinder and having the day off are not good for my relationship.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
He can kiss the multicultural 3 some goodbye
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
Did I see you at the bar last night?
Yes. You just kept grabbing my boobs and saying how much better they are than yours...
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