youre talking to a girl on facebook chat right now and im sitting behind her in class lol. creepy?
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
he was drinking wine. Puking into an empty water bottle. And eating french toast. ....All at the same time.
I'll keep you from getting pregnant and you keep my papers gramaticallly correct
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
Walk back down Church toward Mass Ave. Take a right and head for the guy in a kilt on top of the really tall unicycle. C u soon!
Can you technically cross something off your bucket list if you don't, per say, remember it....?
Dressing as mugato from zoolander Halloween you may want to be the hand model. We can get you a fish bowl filled with Clementine Vodka and soda you can put your hand in.
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
I think we have it figured out.. She's my wife when she's here and gives me advise on how to get ass when she's 1500 miles away.
Atleast we had sex on the couch before your ex took it from you
Have you ever wondered if we are just made up characters in someone's head? You'll have to forgive me right now I think I have 7 thumbs
I'm at forever 21 and someone pooped in the dressing room.
I woke up at 6:30 in the morning on the A train on 14th street. You wouldn't know anything about that right?
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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