No, no, no. Fuck you. I took a glass blowing class solely to learn how to make that bong. You shattered it and my dreams in a matter of five seconds.
and then he publicly announced her herpes on facebook.
Hate is such a strong word! I prefer to think that you strongly dislike me due to the honesty I show towards your routine shortcomings of success in life.
Also. I plan to spend time with you at boomers, high, teaching ourselves how to pee standing up.
She said "I've been waiting to suck your cock since high school." I'm so glad so many freshmen are from our school.
Breakfast Clubbing as Juggalos. I can feel our IQs in freefall.
I honestly feel really bad for any girl with a period that lasts more than a day
Everything about that text makes me want to throttle you and cry
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
What the hell do I have to give up to manifest a dick
Do you understand how hard it is to go down on a guy underwater? Didn't think so....
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
Are there any rules against fucking the hot TA?
Maybe for her....
Her problem, not mine
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
she walked up to me at the bar, kissed me, andthen declared "I HAVEN'T SEEN YOU OR YOUR PENIS SINCE 2011."
Randomize
