There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Everyone knows that the fastest route to a corporate advancement is to take a shot in the mouth
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
One of us needs to be functional tomorrow and it won't be me. I'm drinking liquor out of a fishbowl.
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I told him we couldn't hang out because I had strep, he said he's had it once so he couldn't get it again. The sex isn't worth this level of stupidity
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
The fuck-me-pumps were hot, the XL hoody kinda ruined it.
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
I'm not taking advice from anyone I've seen passed out naked at noon on the hood of a strangers car. Meaning you.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
What i love about my dog is i can lay in bed and masturbate with him at the foot, and he just leaves me alone.
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
Randomize
