Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
Why the fuck is BBQ sauce coming out of my shower head?
Sorry for drunk singing "love hurts" to you at 3 am.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
if you ever get a chance to, fuck in a lecture hall. great acoustics. highly recommend it.
You screamed 'no, YOU put some pants on' at a cop. I pretended not to know you.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
you licked my face then when I finally got you to the bathroom, mid puke you said you liked the taste of my foundation.....you weren't drunk at all....
Im going to seductively wisper "that butters my biscuit" in your ear
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
so my dads pretending to use the snow blower and theres absolutley no snow one the ground.... someone should really lock our liqour cabinet
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