Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
THEY JUST PLAYED KISS FROM A ROSE TONIGHT IS PERFECT
It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
no one is going to fuck you in a field of bunnies
If someone cant be won over with guacomole and tequila they are not worth your time.
Professor took us out for drinks. She said if I ordered the 64oz "Call a Cab," she'd give me an A. I drank it in 5 minutes. A+?
A friday night jus isn't the same if the cops don't raid my dorm
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
They sent me to the hospital. Apparently, of the many things I said, I looked at the doctor and told him, "Wow... it's like you're a REAL DOCTOR!"
Just spread butter on my bathrobe. This has been an ace morning.
His hair looked like he was in a bukaki and then got a perm right after
It was all going fine until I had to chug that strawberita bud light. That really ended badly.
He walked up to anal ring toss like he was going to win you a teddy bear
dude his girlfriend left the meanest shit just marinating in our toilet. I'm gonna have to snap chat this out, theres no other option. prepare yourself
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
Randomize
