I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
beyond obliterated. i recall legitimately trying to use a ballpoint pen as eyeliner.
We sat in his closet and drank four loko out of my camelbak for an hour in the dark. You tell me how my night went.
I honestly can't remember your justification for putting peanut butter on your cell phone.
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
If you could watch a water balloon run... That's what it's like watching her run.
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
Lol he touched my butt after his grad party and a shooting star went by. No kidding. My ass is mystical.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
2016 shall be rememered as the year I sharted while putting up the Christmas tree.
And Mike keeps telling Will that love at first sight is true and this is just a shit show. Help.
Can I borrow your pants?
WTH?
Just come to the men’s room and help me. The blonde bartender figured out I’m married. Rachel will definitely notice if come home pantsless
Randomize
