so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
We were laughing at the passed out guy who had gone to sleep under the car in the McDonald's lot until we realized it was you.
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
We still going to Happy Hour
Idk. I can't because it doesn't fit in my schedule of sleeping or throwing up
She asked me to go inside, make myself a drink and slip into something a little more naked.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
On the way out the door to work grabbed the wine glass on the floor left for the ghost of Elijah and chugged it. PASSOVER.
It's not that I even wanna fuck these guys anymore, just cuddle that's all. My conscience has never been so proud.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
strip vodka pong is never a good idea. I saw into his colon when he picked up the ball off the floor
okay yeah but you've seen me eat jambalaya naked
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
Have you had an orgasm with an n95 mask on yet? It was better than being choked.
Randomize
