I think I'd remember a dick in my mouth
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
If there was an emoticon for a sad penis, i would send it to you
from now on when you get up to pee in the middle of the night, check to see if im sleeping in your parking lot.
i do.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I gurantee you I'll be the only one dressed as a giraffe.
I almost got away with it until she smelled beer on the stroller.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
I got to masturbate in Rome in a gorgeous hotel room. Don't try and tell me I need a boyfriend
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
There should be a promo code on the Papa Johns website for "I have no moneys but if you send a cute delivery guy I will pay him in blow jobs."
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
Why were you twerking to, "The Wheels on the Bus"?
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
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