I can't open my eyes
Lol why not?
Because I have fat ankles and I'm drunk
by the end of the night i am guaranteed to have less of a face than Seal....
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
i just licked mashed potatoes off my blackberry. i'm not even ashamed to admit that to you.
nothing cures the holiday blues like an open bar
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
i know. thats why i need an open bar. i'll get hammered and make a toast about how his dick is like the titanic. large, but full of failure.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
I can't believe she made out with my 15 year old brother. That kid can seriously pull.
Plus it's a good way to scope out guys. Have them fight for you, like real males do in nature.
Thank you for the legal advice. I hope I can pay you in blow jobs.
I think the only option is to smoke so much weed I just pass out for 3 days.
She just kept roaring and saying Katy Perry had nothing on her. Wtf did she take?
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Randomize
