omg he said he wants to insert his penis into my vagnia what do i say
tell him to stop quoting family guy
It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
Sorry for talking about super scientific shit so much last night, I know it bugs you sometimes when I don't shut up.
What? You sat on the couch for a solid 2 hours staring at your fingerprints and the only word that came out of your mouth was "how"
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
I think mounting someone proves who's house this is
Apparently it's ok to apply for building permits drunk. I feel like there definitely is a law preventing that.
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
Don't talk to me about scholarly dedication until you've taken a final in boxers, a bloody tank top and a zip tie to hold your hair back. I wear the most sullied 4.0 crown of all time....
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
Omg one of the midgets from last night just added me to Facebook.
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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