were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
we got our roommate high for the first time. He went into his room alone and watched Malcolm in the middle for three hours
Oh my god. Oh my god. Oh my god. I drunk emailed a professor on friday. Oh my god. Oh my god.
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
If my thighs hurt from cage dancing last night, I can only imagine how yours feel
His tongue was like Jesus himself was blessing my boobs for eternal ecstasy.
I'm not so sure Jesus approves of such activities, but ok.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
omg just made cake vodka jello shots, sooooo excited
dear god these taste like death. death and sprinkles
The spray paint was a bad idea, 'insert penis here' isn't coming off
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
You fell asleep standing up against the shower wall
Randomize
