How are you going to be there by 9am?
Relax I always go to these conferences hung over
You say that like it's a positive quality
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I don't know where my bra went.
Welll you ran into the street, took it off and yelled "I'm a free woman!". And then you threw it at some homeless guy.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
I just used dish soap as body wash. I smell like a dishwasher exploded. isn't the end of the semester fun?
that awkward moment when your booty call gets snowed in at your place.
for future reference mormans are hard to crack but they give fucking amazing hand jobs.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
I couldn't have possibly been that bad
You had her flip the penny over to the lucky side before you picked it up and ate it...
I'm alone, 3 beers in, and cutting tshirts into belly tops.
Like if I exploded right now there would be cum and fajitas everywhere.
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
Randomize
