the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
It took me four clicks to get to 2009 on his profile. This can't work.
full cup flip cup was not exactly the reason I wanted to tell the cops when I was sleeping on the curb
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
the intervention consisted of my aunt taking me to chuck-e-cheezs and telling me that this was my future - either as a mom or as a waitress - unless i stopped fucking around.
did she buy you pizza?
You dont lie about slip and slides
How many band members does it take to become The Band Slut? I think I might be dangerously close
I now have a bottom rung on my kissing scale. Like I can say "Well. On a scale of Matt to Braxton he was probably a Zach." It's the little things.
We took your mom out drinking and we wound up winning 18 games of Flip Cup. You have amazing genetics.
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
I'm a fuck boy trapped in a single mom's body.
Just beer bonged through a snorkel, add that to the list
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
got the runs at the club last night. wondering when it'll be safe to show my face again.
Randomize
