Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
So theres a slight possibility i may not graduate according to planned because i was out getting laid instead of studying. And im okay with that.
I wish the iPhone would register texts from 11:59 as "Last Year" instead of "Yesterday."
a girl is trying to cook hot pockets in a saute pan on the stove.
I think I would be able to remember how to smoke but I can't seem to remember how to breathe.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
I turned down free cocaine. I both respect and regret and that decision.
You asked me if you had to go downstairs to get upstairs. And then you forgot where you were.
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
You fell in the corner and refused to get up unless someone helped you. And then you crawled under the pool table and took a nap.
No worries, I've prioritized my homework into "can do drunk" and "should be sober" categories. We're good.
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
extra points if i make kids and or the elderly cry
Just had the biggest masturbatory crisis ever.
What does that mean?
Internet is down.
Randomize
