You just left with that feminine looking guy you kept calling "Jessica." Just giving the heads up.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Remember the time we were horrifically hung over, went to mcdonalds, an you merely felt the weight of the mcnuggets box and knew there was an extra?
like it was yesterday
Let me start this apology by saying I'm sorry that I bit your penis.
ugh i can't even wear this perfume anymore. it just brings back blurry memories of blowjobs and regret.
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
My feelings are currently in a sea of vodka and "I don't give a shit"
Aren't they always?
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
Not saying puking on the side of a cab was how I imagined freshman year of med school but...
I beer bonged before it even hit 4 o' clock. Please get on my level homecoming style.
Apparently drunk me thought it was a good idea to buy $100 worth of band aids and stick them all over everything in the apartment.
Apparently I give handjobs in my sleep. So that's interesting.
tuscaloosa is terrifying
like people here are just empty shells of drugs and sin
there is no mercy here
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
Played Gay Bar on the jukebox and pissed off the Republicans here. Best day before birthday ever.
Randomize
