I'm jealous of your bromance
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
I was hoping we just happened to wake up naked and I hadn't fucked him.... no such luck.
For future reference, a lint roller appears to be the easiest way to get glitter out of a beard.
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
All I did this weekend was get my life in order. I feel like I wasted my time.
The cab driver thought we were passed out so he called a sexline...
Just watched my entire extended family eat salad out of the bowl i threw up in last night.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
And when I feel bad about myself I go to the library and suck my pen over an open book, counting the seconds until a guy sits across from me and tries to get my attention
We do have a rich storied history of emotional warfare
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
Randomize
