your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
He's taking me to Burger King to celebrate losing my virginity..
you're wrong. we DID have sex last night. just ask your roommate. you seriously don't remember him asking to join us?
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
Mom just texted me to see if it was you who was streaking at the Mariner game... Did you accept yet another $1 bet?
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
P.S. The slutty NASCAR driver costume will be saved and used year round for role play.
I woke up at 3am, my head in a toilet, still at the kegger, wearing a random cowboy hat.
She got turned on by my fanny pack full of condoms. I can't believe you said it was a bad idea to wear it to the party.
Have you seen him ? Seriously. No one is that straight.
Also there's so much vodka on my breath that if I blew on my fingers my nail polish would fall right off
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
So I was dancing on a table with these three girls and my bro. Started to makeout with one and as the song ended I asked what her name was. She said, and I quote, "Nate we hooked up two weeks ago". To which my reply was to lift my beer to bro and proclaim, "RAGE".
Randomize
