He DELETED brick breaker off his blackberry why even bother trying to find something in common?
I'll just wear something slutty to the liquor store and hope for the best
that's your solution for everything
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
I found my keys in the basement freezer. Drunk me is a sneaky little bastard.
I saw this news story about two naked Satanists being arrested so I thought I should ask if you need bail money or pants
You are the funniest drunk Jew I know. Never in my life have I witnessed someone respond, "Is your dick kosher?" while being picked-up on.
He even wore it to bed. What the hell. He's too excited about that goddamn costume.
Just used the handle end of a spatula to get the baggie of coke wedged between my passenger seat. Innovation points?
He tried to break dance on the island in the kitchen and ended up knocking over everyone's alcohol onto the floor then yelled "GUCCI" before vomiting
She'll feel so accomplished if she finally gets to bang me.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Unless your apology includes a 20 something with loose morals and a daddy complex, I'm am not interested
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
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