Just saw 2 very young girls abandon baby buggys in the Xwalk to fight. Gotta love Holyoke.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
Drunk fuck. Had to tell him that the 5 second rule does not apply when your in the bathroom at the hockey game.
I just fell off my chair and knocked over the table. People are staring. That hungover.
Spent the entire ride home from downtown trying to convince designated dawgs to drop us off at waffle house instead of our apartment. i told them it was my house...they didn't buy it.
I tried to say goodbye but you were hugging a trash can and I wasn't sure if you had clothes on
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I feel like you guys are talking about real things and have real problems and I'm just over here like 'should I take muscle relaxers or get drunk tonight?'
I doubt she'll sponsor it. You know alcohol and fireworks don't mix, right?
It's okay. We're not going to soak the fireworks in alcohol. The alcohol is for drinking.
want me to make you a grilled cheese? I can't guarantee it'll be as good as yours but i'll go down on you afterwards if you want
brb printing out this text and putting it on my bedroom wall
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
It's seriously like a finger. But it's a cock. I don't know what to do. I feel like I fuck him to be polite.
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