Everytime we come here you have an ex here.
Sorry I never got back to you. I got high. I know it sounds like a commercial or something... but its true
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
I spent an hour trying to convert bar outfits to church outfits. Its hard.
We left an ass print on the piano.
Just hook me up with your dad already stop being selfish
Well, that now makes it the 4th girlfriend in a row to cheat on me. I don't even care anymore...I'll date a prostitute and not even worry.
She gatecrashed the wedding and managed to get an invite to the open bar reception. Lucky bitch
I vote we get high and sneak off to McDonald's to get mcflurries.
YES. ALL MY YES.
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I just got a hug from a random kid in my class. he said I was a champ at the bar last night..someone help me.
I think my dick has healed enough that we can start having sex again
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