Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
Everybody knows the last week of summer internships include showing up to the office hammered and hitting on the CEO
Goats are brash and offensive and cocky animals
Are you high and at a petting zoo again?
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
my friend thinks you're hot & wants to fuck you ps i'm my friend
This gem of a conversation has been brought to you be weed
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
I just had sex with the male version of myself. looks, mindset, even our boob to dick ratio was the same
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
Was he a virgin!? DID YOU TAKE A GUY'S VIRGINITY ON MY FLOOR!?
I touched a dick in church today
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
