he keeps his weed in a birkenstock shoe box. its like, we get it, youre from oregon.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
Dude, please wake him up, there are pills all over the floor and hes the only one who knows which ones to take simultaneously.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
He bought a sex swing! He's building the playground of my dreams!!!!
Best compliment ever: Being told that you really understand sex by a professional. After she gave you a HANDJOB.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
Hello my rib-scented angel!
Drunk text the hot guy two doors down confessing my love for him.... He gave me a thank you card today.
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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