I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Breaking personal boundaries is my trademark
Can I get a DUI with a shopping cart? I've nearly hit 2 displays and little girl...
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
I'm drugging my best friend. I'm like a whole new level of bitch.
The bouncer at this strip club is my new best friend. He is also very persuasive. He got me to strip onstage for a t shirt. It's a nice shirt.
im in the library and there's this guy on a computer just staring at a google image of beer. finals week is rough.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
She couldn't understand why my walking in on her 70 year old parents ruined any chance of a boner for at least an hour. I think she's too slow for me to fornicate with.
First he fixed my gutter. Then he flogged me and fucked me. Then he bought me a new vacuum cleaner. I don't understand Daddy Dom stuff but I ain't mad at it.
If you had asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be right now at 26 years old, I can bet you one million dollars that "tweezing out my nose hairs before I go in to get laser hair removal on my upper lip" would NOT have been the answer
Dude she literally licked him. He was covered in cheese and in her high state what else was she gonna do?
Randomize