exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
dude that girl has seen more cock ends then weekends
An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
How was I supposed to know she would get offended when I asked her how long it took to draw on her eyebrows.
why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
i wish there was a photo editing effect that fully opened my drunk eyes
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
P.S. I just watched The Muppets. I feel like I just got a sadness enema.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
We were debating whether you had hooked up with him. I was right for the record.
Is it frowned upon to bring a flask to the er?
This is the best thing we've done since that time we started a religion
apparently in the middle of sex, i said "i just really love the food network i watch it every day"
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
Randomize
