Yeah. I hotboxed a windbreaker.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
Say it nicely.
Fine. I want to lovingly bend you over and lovingly fuck the shit out of you. Happy?
We had to introduce ourselves in ethics class. This guy stood up said I'm mark, I love sluts and Jack. Then just sat back down. Hero status.
i am going to show so many millionaires my nipple
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
I hate ovaries. They're horrible little sacs of satanic enmity.
That's the most poetic description of female anatomy I've ever heard.
I just saw an ad for "fair trade quinoa vodka". Fuck this world and everyone in it.
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
Why were u walkin around mc with a toilet bowl lid handcuffed to u and carrying a stuffed Teddy bear last night?
Painted a stripper an elf costume. Her coworkers liked it. Now in a room full of naked strippers.
Social anxiety problems: I just had to get up and change stalls mid-poop because someone sat down in the one next to mine.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize
